Grown Up Heartbreak

So... this is what grown up heartbreak feels like...
No more all night crying,
I sleep through my anxiety,
I'm tough
I'm raw
Say what I want to say
Do what I wanna do

So... this is what grown up heartbreak feels like...
I yell instead of crying
Even though every syllable that comes out of my mouth has me slowly dying
To have you in my face
Only an arms reach away but
You're on ghost mode.
I reach for you and my fingertips go straight through
Only to pierce your soul in a way that is...
Minimal.

So... this is what grown up heartbreak feels like...
Eyes burn from anger not tears
Even though I feel them coming
I can't
I won't
1 simple melodic heartbeat slowly churns itself to become two
offbeat
unsynced
lies

So... this is what grown up heartbreak feels like...
Walking down a path of sharp rocks but you see the light at the end of the tunnel
You look up to see that silver lining on a cloud
So I guess that rationalizes the blood that seeps from the bottom of your feet
As you walk every extra mile
The definition of insanity
Doing the same thing
Over
and Over
And OVER
again
expecting a change to happen...

They said I was psychotic...
I disagree...
I'm insane
and I guess that's just what grown up heartbreak does.